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It was Halloween, and James had brought along some cheap drugstore masks for us to wear. “You don't want these people to be able to see your face.” When he'd forwarded me our reservation the night before, I'd been alarmed by the house rules, which included things like, “Personal hygiene is of the utmost importance” and “No ALWAYS means no.” I wondered what kind of freaks would go to such a place, besides us.

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